The holiday season brings some much needed time off, traditions, and for many of us, an opportunity to reconnect with family. But if you’re like a lot of people, family gatherings can be a source of stress rather than joy. From old conflicts to differing opinions, the dynamics that come with being around family during the holidays can trigger feelings of frustration, anxiety, and even resentment. The holidays don’t have to be a time of dread when it comes to family. With some

Alex (a fictional patient) came to me seeking help with lying, saying that whenever he is “in trouble” – in his partnership or at work, he lies to escape accountability. He says he doesn’t understand why he does this as a pattern but wants to stop because he is no longer trusted at home and his credibility at work is waning. As we explore some of his early experiences, he shares that whenever he made a mistake, his parents met him with overwhelming punishment and was made to

I often hear from couples how one partner shares their pain over something the other partner did or didn’t do, and how poorly their repairs go, leaving both feeling unsatisfied about their efforts to re-connect. I also hear from frustrated partners who are confused because their effort at apologizing fell flat. This addresses some general guidelines for making an apology or amends. Listen The first part of repairing a rupture is to listen. Listen to the effects that your beh

Keri and Bart have been married for 13 years and have a son and a daughter. Bart has had a relationship with alcohol for as long as Keri has known him, but over the years, his intake has increased to the point that he drinks excessively about four nights a week and only slightly less most other nights. He’s not emotionally present, and often not physically present, instead in his workshop for the evening as soon as dinner is over, leaving Keri to help their kids with homewor